Circumcision

Back in 2007 when Sean and I first got together and were talking about someday having kids, we naturally were talking about the kind of parents we wanted to be and our views on different aspects of parenting. Our conversation was almost a word association type conversation in which we basically just brought up a subject, said whether we were for or against or whatever and on to the next one. Since we agreed on about everything there wasn't much actual discussion, just agreement of views. Breastfeeding? Yep. Natural birth? As natural as you want. Vaccines? Nope. Spanking? Nope. Circumcision? Nope. Schooling? Ok so that one's not really yes or no and I actually don't think we talked about it in that conversation. That one has morphed around a bit and we are somewhere between homeschooling and unschooling in our thoughts at this point although we obviously have plenty of time so work that one out since we can't even manage to get pregnant yet.

One thing I am grateful of on this journey of infertility is that it has given me time to learn so much about the parent I want to be. While I haven't really changed my beliefs too much, I think the last 3 years of reading and learning has solidified some views and loosened others. I think I won't be stumbling around as a new mom quite as much as I would have been had we gotten pregnant as soon as we started trying. I never thought of myself as afraid of controversy or of being a person who would perhaps falter under the pressure of people with dissenting views but I know now that I think I *would* have had some problems standing up for what I believe in for my child. I now know that I am strong enough to stand up for myself and my child and to defend, if needed, my views on parenting.

One point of view that has sort of changed has been my views on circumcision. At the time of that conversation I knew I didn't want *my* son circumcised, but was of the "It's up to the parents" mindset. The more I have learned over the last few years, and the last few months in particular, I no longer believe it should be up to the parents. It should be up to HIM. It's HIS penis, what right does anyone, even a parent, have to cut part of it off? Why is this cosmetic surgery acceptable when any other cosmetic surgery for an infant illegal?

Well, I didn't want to go into it hard and heavy in this post. I actually meant for this post to be a short intro for a series of posts in which I am going to talk about the different reasons parents decide to circumcise their son(s). I can't promise to be nice and I am certainly aware that not everyone is going to agree. My intent in doing this series is NOT to attack, belittle or judge parents who have circumcised their boys, but rather to make them think about the pros, cons, benefits, risks and ramifications of this surgery before they make that decision again. After all, the vast majority of parents want to be good parents and want to do what's best for their child. I honestly believe that and believe that the majority of parents who circumcise do so because they honestly believe it is the best decision. I am all about making educated choices whether your choice agrees with mine or not. For most things, in parenting and in life, I will support a person's choice whether I think it's the right choice or not, as long as it's an educated choice and not a "going with the flow" choice. I do admit that circumcision is where I draw the line on this simply because, like I stated above, it IS a choice, it SHOULD BE a choice - HIS choice.

So anyways, before I have alienated everyone and also covered enough ground to make the series itself irrelevant, I will shut up now. Keep an eye out for the first installment - "It's Cleaner".