Michelle - Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Friday, October 29, 2010
New Alexis picture
Michelle - Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Knit by Michelle - fundraising for Alexis
I am a knitter, I believe I have mentioned this before. I have started making items to sell to help raise money for Katie and her family. I have been making things as people order them but I am thinking of making up one or two special things and setting up an Ebay auction. Since I can only knit so fast I am thinking this has the potential to bring in overall more money for them since individual items bring in some money but a nationwide auction for something like this I think would really have the potential to raise some money. What do you think? Here are a few of the items I have made so far...
Alexis update
Alexis had her stem cell transplant done on Tuesday. She looks terrible and she sleeps a lot but sometimes she has enough energy to play. That night she patted her bald head and said lotion....apparently her head felt dry! lol!!
Monday, October 18, 2010
Alexis update
Alexis was admitted to the hospital this morning. Her little brother William was there but will not be able to be there again for quite a while due to her exposure limitations. She starts chemo tomorrow. Her 7th round and this one is the big one to prep her body for the stem cell transplant. She has a new round of doctors now, a new routine and new ways of getting things done. The world is pretty stressful right now, please keep the family in your thoughts and prayers.
Michelle
P.S. I have had several people asking me about sending cards to Alexis. Please email me privately for a mailing address.
Michelle
P.S. I have had several people asking me about sending cards to Alexis. Please email me privately for a mailing address.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Arabian stallion looking for a home
NO NOT MARQUIS!!
Ok now that THAT is clear lol.
Firdausi is 14 years old. He's a Straight Egyptian Arabian stallion. He is by Zedann and out of Malkata (after you click on her name, scroll down to view her photo), here is his full pedigree He was bred to Desert Suez 5 times. Pictures below are two of his babies.
Be aware there is some drama involving Firdausi. He is owned by a friend and being taken care of by another friend. They are no longer friends and there is much animosity between the two now. Most people have not wanted to deal with the drama in order to get this nice stallion. He is worth it. His owner, his original breeder and his caretaker all agree he needs to be moved sooner rather than later for the sanity of all involved so hopefully all the drama can be put aside and ignored for his sake. He deserves to be somewhere where he is loved. Is that with you? If so contact me and I will put you in touch with all involved parties. Firdausi is located in California. Firdausi found a home, thanks.
Ok now that THAT is clear lol.
Firdausi is 14 years old. He's a Straight Egyptian Arabian stallion. He is by Zedann and out of Malkata (after you click on her name, scroll down to view her photo), here is his full pedigree He was bred to Desert Suez 5 times. Pictures below are two of his babies.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Racism
Does racism still exist? Of course it does, it is alive and well, unfortunately. I am not talking about immigration issues, whether this person or that person should be allowed into or to remain in our country. That's a whole different topic from what I am talking about. Please note I didn't say it's not related and I didn't say it's not relevant nor important, just that that's not what I want to talk about today.
I am talking about flat out, my skin is white and yours is not so therefore you are less of a person than I am, racism. It is there. It is one of the most frustrating things to ever exist. There are still KKK out there, plotting how to rid the world of those they feel are inferior to them. How sad.
Just as sad is the fact that as horrible as direct racism is, it is damaging not only in the immediacy of it, but also damages the psyche of those it effects and it carries long term damage. People who have been exposed to racism are hurt by it and their outlook on life is also hurt by it and how they interact with others is affected by both direct and indirect racism.
To be clear, it is no secret I am white. Clear and through as far as I know, I have no black relatives, I grew up in a lily white town and remember it was big news in my senior year when we had a black family move in to town and their two kids joined our school. As an adult I have dated black guys, I was engaged to one. I lived in his world and was introduced to racism first hand both in the general sense and directly as I am sure many are aware of the abuse that can be directed at those who align themselves with targets, so to speak. But no matter what I saw and heard, no matter that I used to live in a "rough" part of town, no matter that I was raised by a cultural anthropologist that taught me to be aware of those who are different from us, embrace their differences and to look with open eyes to be aware of those who hate because of those differences, I am still a white girl and will never be able to fully understand the evils of racism and what it really means to live in the face of extreme racism.
Having said that and getting back to my original point. I find it incredibly sad that there is still enough racism in this country and in the minds of people that a person, either through conditioning brought on by direct exposure to racism or by indirectly being taught about racism, is so conditioned that racism is out there, when slighted for anything, their first inclination is to holler racism.
For example I was shopping at Goodwill a couple of weeks ago. It was approaching closing time and those of us in the store were getting up to the register to check out. There were shelves of smaller items close to the register and two older black ladies, myself and a hispanic woman around my age were all taking turns looking at the stuff on these shelves. The cashier was neatening racks nearby and when she saw us all up there, came up to the register and asked if anyone was ready to check out. The hispanic lady and I said no not yet, the one black lady had wandered off and the other indicated she was waiting for her friend to be ready. So the cashier stood there for a bit, asked again if anyone was ready, got no response and went back to the rack she was working on. As she was walking away, the second black lady came back to the register and, to her friend, said "What, is she not going to wait on us or something?". They continued to complain to each other about the announcement that the store was closing ("I wear a watch, I know what time it is"), that the cashier was not there, etc. One aggressively banged the bell on the counter DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING.
The cashier poked her head out from an aisle and said she would be right there. In the couple of minutes it took her to get up there, they continued to rail about it. When the cashier returned, she was followed closely by the other cashier, a young man. The ladies huffed at each other and one asked the cashier "So are YOU going to ring me up or do you need HIM to do it?" The cashier looked slightly confused and said she thought she could handle it. The first lady put her couple of things on the counter, said she wasn't buying them after all. Her friend did the same thing and as they stomped to the door they chattered to each other about how the cashier was racist and had to go get a man to come protect her from the black people.
After they left we all just looked at each other and the cashier said that in actuality she HAD gone to get him - because there was also a man in the store (that left as the ladies were putting their items on the counter) and the last time that man was in the store he had been harassing the cashier and making lewd comments to her. As she was checking me out, she told the hispanic lady behind me that she was again sorry for having taken the lady's cart away while she was in the restroom. The lady jokingly said that the cashier had only done that because she was hispanic. We all laughed, I gathered my stuff and left as she checked out. As I was getting in my car, the two black ladies were just driving away and one screamed out the window at me "REDNECK RACIST BITCH". Now whether she was talking to me or just at the store itself I can't be sure, if at me why? Because I continued with my purchases? If I had thought the ladies were being discriminated against, I would have joined them in declining my purchases. Was it just because I was there? Because I was white? I don't know but either way it only saddened me further.
I feel so sorry for those ladies that either they have experienced so much racism that it is just expected and the only logical explanation for anything that goes wrong in their day or that they have been raised to believe it regardless of how much racism they have directly experienced (I am a realist enough to believe it highly unlikely that they have NEVER experienced racism).
A woman I know, we will call her Matilda, is extremely racist. Matilda's significant other is even worse. He might be Klan, it wouldn't surprise me a bit, I know he knows Klan members. I know this because about 8 or 9 years ago when him and my mom worked together, my uncle was mugged up in Michigan. The boys who did it were black and this guy asked my mom if she wanted him to hook her up with some Klan members to hunt those boys down. Thankfully he no longer works there (was fired after physically threatening my mom but that's another story) but Matilda and my mom are friends despite her racist attitude. And racist she certainly is. Back when I was dating Frankie, mom hated him. I had never dated a black guy before and her and I both thought that racism was in fact raising it's ugly head in our home. It turned out mom hated him for HIM, not because he was black.
Anyways, at the time Matilda certainly helped fuel mom's hatred of him in many ways and helped her in trying to break us up simply because Matilda believes it is absolutely, 100% morally wrong to date outside your own ethnicity (I personally HATE the word "race" as we are all the human race, I know most people consider it to be correct and whether it is or not, I can't bring myself to use it). I guess whether you believe that or not is 100% the issue as much as WHY you believe it or not. Some people believe in "breeding pure" in order to preserve ethnic blood and values and such. It's not that they think any less of others, it's just a matter of being true to your own people I guess. I can see the logic in that I suppose. I don't necessarily agree with it in the way of telling others what to do but if that's what you believe I can't really fault you for following through on it. That's not Matilda's train of thought though. She honestly, 100% believes that white people are superior and that we should not "lower ourselves" to date anyone else. The very idea of it actually sickens her. That sickens me. That level of hatred for other humans. I just can't comprehend and don't understand.
I think that's what gets me the most, what is at the heart of it. Hatred. Why do we so often need to hate SOMEBODY. So many people just seem to need that and I don't understand it. Perhaps it comes down to self love? Maybe Dan at Single Dad Laughing knows. He hasn't talked about racism specifically but he is all about loving each other and trying to make the world a better place by eliminating hatred and the things hatred feeds. Let's join him, shall we?
*edited to clarify that it is not my mom who is horrifically racist*
I am talking about flat out, my skin is white and yours is not so therefore you are less of a person than I am, racism. It is there. It is one of the most frustrating things to ever exist. There are still KKK out there, plotting how to rid the world of those they feel are inferior to them. How sad.
Just as sad is the fact that as horrible as direct racism is, it is damaging not only in the immediacy of it, but also damages the psyche of those it effects and it carries long term damage. People who have been exposed to racism are hurt by it and their outlook on life is also hurt by it and how they interact with others is affected by both direct and indirect racism.
To be clear, it is no secret I am white. Clear and through as far as I know, I have no black relatives, I grew up in a lily white town and remember it was big news in my senior year when we had a black family move in to town and their two kids joined our school. As an adult I have dated black guys, I was engaged to one. I lived in his world and was introduced to racism first hand both in the general sense and directly as I am sure many are aware of the abuse that can be directed at those who align themselves with targets, so to speak. But no matter what I saw and heard, no matter that I used to live in a "rough" part of town, no matter that I was raised by a cultural anthropologist that taught me to be aware of those who are different from us, embrace their differences and to look with open eyes to be aware of those who hate because of those differences, I am still a white girl and will never be able to fully understand the evils of racism and what it really means to live in the face of extreme racism.
Having said that and getting back to my original point. I find it incredibly sad that there is still enough racism in this country and in the minds of people that a person, either through conditioning brought on by direct exposure to racism or by indirectly being taught about racism, is so conditioned that racism is out there, when slighted for anything, their first inclination is to holler racism.
For example I was shopping at Goodwill a couple of weeks ago. It was approaching closing time and those of us in the store were getting up to the register to check out. There were shelves of smaller items close to the register and two older black ladies, myself and a hispanic woman around my age were all taking turns looking at the stuff on these shelves. The cashier was neatening racks nearby and when she saw us all up there, came up to the register and asked if anyone was ready to check out. The hispanic lady and I said no not yet, the one black lady had wandered off and the other indicated she was waiting for her friend to be ready. So the cashier stood there for a bit, asked again if anyone was ready, got no response and went back to the rack she was working on. As she was walking away, the second black lady came back to the register and, to her friend, said "What, is she not going to wait on us or something?". They continued to complain to each other about the announcement that the store was closing ("I wear a watch, I know what time it is"), that the cashier was not there, etc. One aggressively banged the bell on the counter DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING.
The cashier poked her head out from an aisle and said she would be right there. In the couple of minutes it took her to get up there, they continued to rail about it. When the cashier returned, she was followed closely by the other cashier, a young man. The ladies huffed at each other and one asked the cashier "So are YOU going to ring me up or do you need HIM to do it?" The cashier looked slightly confused and said she thought she could handle it. The first lady put her couple of things on the counter, said she wasn't buying them after all. Her friend did the same thing and as they stomped to the door they chattered to each other about how the cashier was racist and had to go get a man to come protect her from the black people.
After they left we all just looked at each other and the cashier said that in actuality she HAD gone to get him - because there was also a man in the store (that left as the ladies were putting their items on the counter) and the last time that man was in the store he had been harassing the cashier and making lewd comments to her. As she was checking me out, she told the hispanic lady behind me that she was again sorry for having taken the lady's cart away while she was in the restroom. The lady jokingly said that the cashier had only done that because she was hispanic. We all laughed, I gathered my stuff and left as she checked out. As I was getting in my car, the two black ladies were just driving away and one screamed out the window at me "REDNECK RACIST BITCH". Now whether she was talking to me or just at the store itself I can't be sure, if at me why? Because I continued with my purchases? If I had thought the ladies were being discriminated against, I would have joined them in declining my purchases. Was it just because I was there? Because I was white? I don't know but either way it only saddened me further.
I feel so sorry for those ladies that either they have experienced so much racism that it is just expected and the only logical explanation for anything that goes wrong in their day or that they have been raised to believe it regardless of how much racism they have directly experienced (I am a realist enough to believe it highly unlikely that they have NEVER experienced racism).
A woman I know, we will call her Matilda, is extremely racist. Matilda's significant other is even worse. He might be Klan, it wouldn't surprise me a bit, I know he knows Klan members. I know this because about 8 or 9 years ago when him and my mom worked together, my uncle was mugged up in Michigan. The boys who did it were black and this guy asked my mom if she wanted him to hook her up with some Klan members to hunt those boys down. Thankfully he no longer works there (was fired after physically threatening my mom but that's another story) but Matilda and my mom are friends despite her racist attitude. And racist she certainly is. Back when I was dating Frankie, mom hated him. I had never dated a black guy before and her and I both thought that racism was in fact raising it's ugly head in our home. It turned out mom hated him for HIM, not because he was black.
Anyways, at the time Matilda certainly helped fuel mom's hatred of him in many ways and helped her in trying to break us up simply because Matilda believes it is absolutely, 100% morally wrong to date outside your own ethnicity (I personally HATE the word "race" as we are all the human race, I know most people consider it to be correct and whether it is or not, I can't bring myself to use it). I guess whether you believe that or not is 100% the issue as much as WHY you believe it or not. Some people believe in "breeding pure" in order to preserve ethnic blood and values and such. It's not that they think any less of others, it's just a matter of being true to your own people I guess. I can see the logic in that I suppose. I don't necessarily agree with it in the way of telling others what to do but if that's what you believe I can't really fault you for following through on it. That's not Matilda's train of thought though. She honestly, 100% believes that white people are superior and that we should not "lower ourselves" to date anyone else. The very idea of it actually sickens her. That sickens me. That level of hatred for other humans. I just can't comprehend and don't understand.
I think that's what gets me the most, what is at the heart of it. Hatred. Why do we so often need to hate SOMEBODY. So many people just seem to need that and I don't understand it. Perhaps it comes down to self love? Maybe Dan at Single Dad Laughing knows. He hasn't talked about racism specifically but he is all about loving each other and trying to make the world a better place by eliminating hatred and the things hatred feeds. Let's join him, shall we?
*edited to clarify that it is not my mom who is horrifically racist*
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Alexis update
Alexis will be admitted on Monday for stem cell transplant. It will be minimum of 6 weeks in the hospital with many rules and precautions as her immune system will be completely wiped out. This is a risky time for her. If you could, please keep her in prayers, thoughts or well wishes, whatever your faith prompts you to do. She will also be undergoing immuno therapy for 9ish months so even though she is in remission, her road to recovery is still a long one. For more information on Alexis please see the previous post Alexis.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Infertility
Sean and I decided in Spring 2008 that we would stop trying to prevent getting pregnant. We weren't going to full on try yet but just "not try not to". By August we were ready to move on to "trying". Two years later we are still trying. After one visit to a women's clinic to rule out thyroid issues and pcos, both of which I was possibly showing symptoms of, I was given a clean bill of health and a bill once it was determined that my insurance doesn't even cover TALKING about fertility issues, let alone actually doing any fertility treatments. Since then we have just plugged along, living our lives and doing what we can on our own to boost fertility chances, hoping that it will happen.
We have talked about fertility treatments. We are naturally minded people who do not go the doctor, do not take drugs or medications unless it is absolutely necessary, we eat as organic and sustainable as we can. We abhor the thought of drugs and procedures and tests and...some say we just don't want to be parents badly enough. My mother actually had the nerve to say it that bluntly to me and then acted like she couldn't figure out why I started crying, hung up the phone on her and wouldn't talk to her for a few weeks. I finally had to break the ice and talk to her again, it wasn't worth losing my mom over but she has never so much as apologised to me. We don't talk about my infertiliy anymore and that upsets me greatly as my mom is one of my best friends and I thought I could talk to her about anything.
Anyways.
I struggle with the fertility treatment issue. It's not just the drug thing or the doctor thing. Our insurance covers nothing as I stated above, I had to pay for the freaking thyroid test because I mentioned messed up cycles as one possible symptom of thyroid problems. We are not rich. We aren't poor, but we aren't rich. We are working very hard to be debt free. We are in gazelle intensity mode. We don't have thousands of dollars to put towards medical treatments. Sure we could get a loan or put it on credit cards but that is what we are trying to get away from, debt. Not that a baby wouldn't be worth it. If the fertility treatments even worked. Did you know that 1 in 5 women with fertility problems never carry a child to term? Regardless of fertility treatments? That's appalling. Scary. So I could go against everything we believe, dig us so far into debt we may never climb out, pump myself full of drugs that will do who knows what to me only to end up 5-10-15 years down the road and still not have a baby. Part of me is willing to take the risks. Sell everything. Borrow what we can. Charge the rest. Anything.
I just want to be a mom.
This isn't me but I found it on Youtube and thought I would share it.
We have talked about fertility treatments. We are naturally minded people who do not go the doctor, do not take drugs or medications unless it is absolutely necessary, we eat as organic and sustainable as we can. We abhor the thought of drugs and procedures and tests and...some say we just don't want to be parents badly enough. My mother actually had the nerve to say it that bluntly to me and then acted like she couldn't figure out why I started crying, hung up the phone on her and wouldn't talk to her for a few weeks. I finally had to break the ice and talk to her again, it wasn't worth losing my mom over but she has never so much as apologised to me. We don't talk about my infertiliy anymore and that upsets me greatly as my mom is one of my best friends and I thought I could talk to her about anything.
Anyways.
I struggle with the fertility treatment issue. It's not just the drug thing or the doctor thing. Our insurance covers nothing as I stated above, I had to pay for the freaking thyroid test because I mentioned messed up cycles as one possible symptom of thyroid problems. We are not rich. We aren't poor, but we aren't rich. We are working very hard to be debt free. We are in gazelle intensity mode. We don't have thousands of dollars to put towards medical treatments. Sure we could get a loan or put it on credit cards but that is what we are trying to get away from, debt. Not that a baby wouldn't be worth it. If the fertility treatments even worked. Did you know that 1 in 5 women with fertility problems never carry a child to term? Regardless of fertility treatments? That's appalling. Scary. So I could go against everything we believe, dig us so far into debt we may never climb out, pump myself full of drugs that will do who knows what to me only to end up 5-10-15 years down the road and still not have a baby. Part of me is willing to take the risks. Sell everything. Borrow what we can. Charge the rest. Anything.
I just want to be a mom.
This isn't me but I found it on Youtube and thought I would share it.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Alexis
This is Alexis
She is my baby sister Katie's daughter. Alexis was born 2/7/2009. In May of 2010 she was diagnosed with stage 4 neuroblastoma, a rare form of aggressive cancer in children.Most of the summer of 2010 was spent at Helen DeVos Children's Hospital in Grand Rapids, Michigan as she underwent round after round of chemo, developed c-diff, an infection of the digestive system, and was in and out of isolation.
In September she went through her 6th round of chemo. Afterward she had an MIBG scan to see how much of the cancer remained - it came back CLEAR, SHE IS IN REMISSION!!!! She still has to go through an intensive round of chemo followed by a stem cell transplant and 9ish months of immunotherapy since neuroblastoma is so hard to kill completely and comes back very easily.
Please keep my baby sister, her daughter and the rest of her family in your prayers. Also keep an eye out for updates, they will all be labeled "Alexis" and I will add links at the bottom of this post when I update as well.
She is my baby sister Katie's daughter. Alexis was born 2/7/2009. In May of 2010 she was diagnosed with stage 4 neuroblastoma, a rare form of aggressive cancer in children.Most of the summer of 2010 was spent at Helen DeVos Children's Hospital in Grand Rapids, Michigan as she underwent round after round of chemo, developed c-diff, an infection of the digestive system, and was in and out of isolation.
In September she went through her 6th round of chemo. Afterward she had an MIBG scan to see how much of the cancer remained - it came back CLEAR, SHE IS IN REMISSION!!!! She still has to go through an intensive round of chemo followed by a stem cell transplant and 9ish months of immunotherapy since neuroblastoma is so hard to kill completely and comes back very easily.
Please keep my baby sister, her daughter and the rest of her family in your prayers. Also keep an eye out for updates, they will all be labeled "Alexis" and I will add links at the bottom of this post when I update as well.
Update 10/14: http://greenfoley.blogspot.com/2010/10/alexis-update.html
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